Changes

The end of summer is here and I am beyond sad and honestly a little terrified.  Kenneth and I start pre-planning on Monday and Levi will start daycare.  I think this is going to be way harder on me than the two boys... actually I know it will be - I have been having mini breakdowns for weeks now just thinking about it!  Kenneth is used to getting up and going to work - he has had to all summer but I on the other hand have had the good fortune to be at home with the boy for the last 8 weeks.  I know that I shouldn't be whining because there are lots of people who don't get that opportunity but the last 8 weeks flew by - I really have no clue where the time went!  But I have gone back through and looked at pictures on my how the boy has changed in the last 8 weeks!

I think I'm most sad about missing things - just the little things but I know every working parent feels that way and this is nothing new.  I am also terrified because as much as I hate to admit it this kid is a mama's boy!  I am sure that it is my fault... more than one person has told me that I should be letting him stay with other people so that both of us can get used to to it but honestly I don't think that anyone can really blame me for wanting to spend every minute I can with that sweet boy or cuddle with him as much as possible - I keep being told by other friends that he is almost at the stage where he won't want to be held so I'm taking full advantage right now!  But with all that being said - I can't even imagine what he is going to be feeling that first day of daycare when he looks for me and I'm not there and he doesn't know his surroudnings.  The kid has stranger danger down - he gets upset when he doesn't know or recongnize people.  One thing is certain - I will not be the person dropping him off that first day!  I know he will adjust more quickly than I will but oh my - breaks my heart!

Anyway, we will all be adjusting to our new roles soon but for now, or at least the next few days I will be spoiling that baby!  I had planned on doing a lot of work this week but then I decided that can wait - the kid will only be this way for so long and I'm going to enjoy it! :)